Finding Hope Amongst the Chaos - Aayushi Chandra

January 11, 2021

There were many things my dad cultivated in himself and in others, but two things specifically: kindness and joy. 

He said kindness was always an option and a choice in opposition to anything else. Kindness is never fleeting and can be deliberately and intentionally cultivated. Although my dad was unable to speak or move for most of his hospitalization, his generosity brought tears to the staff’s eyes wherever he was. His forms of appreciation are not hard to carry out, but require careful attention.

Being kind and selfless is not difficult: here are some ways my dad exuded both; saying “thank you” (in actions or in words), goes a long way. If someone takes the time or energy out of their day to better your life in ways small or large, we can reciprocate this appreciation by finding ways to express how much we value them. Next, being kind also means treating whoever crosses your path with respect and dignity, even if the other person doesn’t do the same. While we all butt heads, we can still find knowledge in disagreements and help each other grow. And lastly, my dad always carried a “we before me” mentality. He owed his successes to each friend, mentor, and stranger who got him to the top and he made sure he paid these tokens of kindness back to anyone who needed it. 

I will always be fascinated by my dad’s ability to find joys in each day, even during the darkest months of his life. As I, and many others around the world, continue to grieve, I turn to my dad to direct me. Like him, I find small and large joys in people, ideas, and things every single day. I’ve learned that there is at least one thing in each day that propels me to get on my feet and live life fully saturated. I know this is possible because my dad did it throughout the scariest months of his life, and I hope you can too!

Here’s a short list of things that I call my “every-days”: people that make us want to do and be better, inspire us, or make us laugh; music that makes us feel some intense emotion; a meal that’s been curated with love; our physical ability to stay fit; a candle with a warm glow; a tv show that helps us think; knowledge through reading that helps us learn; or an idea that excites us about the future. 

In honoring my father and his essence, I hope people can carry these attributes and spread my dad’s wisdom to those they care about. I hope I’ve done some of my dad’s teaching’s justice and I hope at the turn of a new year we all choose to be kind to one-another and find daily joys that make the life at our fingertips worth living. In the spirit of giving-- tell the people you love that you love them and bring joy to someone who may need it!